Wednesday, March 27, 2013

My [BARK]-Blocking Dog

WARNING: This post may contain canine profanity. All pictures have been changed to protect the identities of any actual dogs.


So, I'm entertaining the other night and I'm getting ready to [BARK] her [BARK] when my psycho [BARK]ing dog decides to start a conversation.

Because he is on the other side of my [BARK] thin walls, my every movement and thought are his tapestry to [BARK] up with his [BARK]ing dialog.

So, she says to me, "why don't you let him [BARK] in your bed?"

"Well, his [BARK]ing behavior in the middle of the [BARK] bothers me. I can't be sure he won't get up and [BARK] on the floor or the couch while I am asleep. And, this is MY bed to [BARK] on!"

Well, she saw the logic in that and let it alone, cause she's [BARK] like that. She sat squarely on the [BARK] for a few moments before she full saw my [BARK].

"My God, that [BARK] sure is [BARK], and sure does [BARK] a lot."

"I know! Imagine trying to [BARK] with that?!"

"I don't know if it will ever [BARK]. I don't know if I could."

As time passed, soon she had reached that same [BARK] as I had. We were just about to get down to some serious [BARK]ing, when she says, "You need to do something about that [BARK]ing ! I'm never going to [BARK] with that noise!"

"I'm sorry. I hear [BARK] happens to a lot of guys."

"What are you going to [BARK] about it?"

Damn [BARK]-blocking dog!



I'll show him, I'm blogging about it because the little [BARK]er can't get on the internet to read it... He doesn't have the WiFi key! [BARK] that!



  1. I would love to understand what dogs say when they bark..............

  2. My min pin loves to hide under our blankets. And then bark at the slightest noise started by mysterious things... Which is everything... Because She's under the blanket and can't see.

    My min pin is a jerk.


    Valerie Nunez and the Flying Platypi

  3. I'd strangle the little [BARK]er.

  4. Oh, that thought crossed my mind.

  5. Canine mad libs. I like!

  6. I've got a Cairn Terrier who talks/barks way too much. She's annoying as hell, but I adore her. :)

  7. And this is why I decided to smother the neighbour's dog with my fancy new pillow...

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