Saturday, January 5, 2013

The Everyday Gollum


Did I mention that my Shaggy is precioussss? Yes, I'm living with my very own Gollum / Smeagol at my house. He is pretty dead on with his impressions and unlike Andy Serkis, this Gollum lives in Suburbia and walks among the people!



When I discussed this little project with him, he was overjoyed at the prospect of going viral like a flu bug in a preschool on finger paint day.

What would an "Everyday Gollum" look like, act like, and do during a regular day? Besides referring to himself in the third person, here's what we thought...

What day doesn't start with a visit to the local Starbucks to order pretentious coffee....

This IS the grunge look!


Even the best coffee isn't helpful in finding your way, Gollum checks his GPSssss.

Smeagol is so lost...


Are you having a rough day at work? Here'sss a little Officssse Sssspace for you.


So, Office Etiquette is difficult for poor Gollum as you can see.


Don't get us started about our job precious and the awful hobbitsss we deal with..


Perhaps you're ready to order some lunch?


Someone giving you a bad time? Give 'me a little Samuel L. Gollum!


After a hard day at work and dealing with the Ogres and Witches, even Gollum needs to hit happy hour and chase a little tail.


As you can imagine, even the most clever line doesn't win over the ladies when you're sporting a greasy comb over. Sometimes holding the ones you love whilest singing a gentle lullaby is the only solace.


Yesss, folkssss, WilyGuy has hisss very own precioussss. He isss willing to share, unlike mean Smeagol.

Got something you want to hear? I'm sure he's up for it. Lets keep it relatively clean. One request per customer, though if you want to contribute to buy him the "One Ring," I'm sure he wouldn't say no to preciouss. (PayPal address available upon request)



This will be more fun than asking Siri "Who's your daddy?" Speaking of which...



We love the Dude Writessss. We mustn't share the Dude Writessss. We will share the Dude Writessss if we are left alone with the precioussss.



  1. Which one do you like the best?

  2. Ok this is something about the Hobbit characters I have no idea I am just guess from the

  3. I'm thinking that you may have too much time on your hands.

  4. Mod Mom Beyond IndieDomJanuary 12, 2013 at 5:15 PM

    We LOVE this post, preciousss! You're impression is far superior to ours! We must kiiiiilll you! Oh nooooo!!! Not the Preciousssss! We lived his Office Space reference and his Starbucks order. We think this is brilliant.

  5. That's loved, not lived. We always hit thi I. Foolish Hobbitsss.

  6. I have been wanting to do a project with my son and this gave me a good opportunity. That said, we had a great time killing an afternoon.

  7. We thinks we likes your comment, precioussss.

  8. That was so fun :). I particularly liked the pick-up line. What precious could resist?? But I think my favorite part was imaging how much fun the two of you must have had making those recordings.

  9. A complete blast. It was really special. I got to showcase him and that was important to me.

  10. Aww look at you whipping out your precious...yeah, I went all Randall on you. The recordings were great!

  11. That's a pretty bang on impression your son does there.

    As long as he doesn't take up living in the basement in the dark, you should be alright. .....but then, a lot of young people like living in their rooms with the windows blacked out, so it may be hard to tell?

  12. Wow, that is spot on!

  13. I'll let him know you think so.

  14. Don't they all live in darkness at that age?

  15. How do I know what has been dug out underneath the house.

  16. Was my jack hammer and excavator too loud?

  17. Haha, that was hilarious. One of the best impressions I've heard of Smeagol. Nicely done!

  18. Thanks Michael, I will pass that along.




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