Monday, October 29, 2012

Glinting in the Sun

When I saw it, I nearly cried.

Glinting in the sun, recently unearthed as I labored to plant new roses in my garden.

It's loss had paved the way to more losses. Its loss unremembered, contrary to the promise it represented, a promise that required loss of the finger if the ring was lost.

It had been replaced, but the damage was done.

The accusations, the luggage, the damage in haste to the roses so lovingly grown.

Discovered as I planted the new roses, the memories of it came flooding back and then unleashed a flood of salty tears.


Dude Write

I am participating in the monthly flash fiction challenge at Dude Write, the place where dudes write and compete. October's challenge had 500 words to tell a story that begins with "When I saw it, I nearly cried." I told mine in an even 100. I hope you like it. Head over, read the other entries and vote on the 1st.


Tuesday, October 23, 2012

100 Word Song - Sharp Dressed Man

My Blog Can Beat Up Your Blog


Hitting up the next 100 Word Song challenge over at Lance's place.

This one to ZZ Top's Sharp Dressed Man.


He looked good, but he always looked good. It was a gala event and he would command the attention of the ladies. Heck, he would have everyone's attention. Babes in bikinis would gather around him, going largely unnoticed, such was his presence.

His car wouldn't be the fastest, nor would anyone notice him being dropped off in the Limo, but nobody beat him on the suit. Armani was his friend. He practically lived in it. His hair perfectly styled, he sipped his Evian as he made his way to the center of the action.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, for your entertainment, 12 Rounds of Heavyweight Boxing..."

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Muck That!

16868? Your order is ready!
This is a simple number 16868.

What it represents is part insanity and part insanity. Greetings from the Rebel Race!

Surely you've heard of it, or something similar. Tough Mudder or the Warrior Dash are other similar races. Imagine if you took a triathlon, removed the actual swimming and took away the bicycles, then had it being run by a Marine drill instructor. Did I mention there would be mud? Oh, and Beer!

We Were Clean...
So the concept is simple, you run a 5K (that's 3.1 miles) with a few obstacles. You can also choose to run a 15K, if you like to prolong the periods between when you begin running and begin drinking. A 5K is simple, of course, in principle. So simple that training isn't really required.

You start as Teenwolf and I did by getting your number and pinning it on. Most people wear it on their shirt, but as I had a "most muscular" pose I was planning for later, I decided to chance safety pins on my shorts. If only you could see my feet, you would note the whiteness of my legs socks and shoes. I chose to wear my optional eye black patches in the Belushi pose. Yes, I ran the race with mock surprise.

So the race started with a daring sprint down a path behind a few barns and I went ahead and let my fellow runners find and take with them the land mines left by our equine friends. The first obstacle was so ridiculous that I thought we had wasted our time. We had to put our hands down and crawl under some snow fencing. Please Rebel Race, be better than that!

After we crossed the road, the next big obstacle we faced was a rope cross of a pond. It was probably about 50 yards across and seemed like it would be no problem, I had worn long socks after all. Lock the legs, go hand over hand, how tough could it be? Well, the rope burned everything it touched. My hands and legs were instantly calloused and I cursed my lack of gloves and military grade boots. Did I mention the water was cold? And Muddy? And kinda deep? Midway across, my feet barely touched the bottom and when they did, there was a good foot of mud. I survived the swim and realized I would never do a triathlon. Note to self, muddy waterlogged shoes and socks are difficult to run in...

The majority of the next third of the course was running and leaping small obstacles. I had visions through this period of a Steeplechase race. Survival was the key. Around the two thirds mark, we got to muck through some small streams, many compatriots began to complain and try to go around these. Running the race with my eldest son was tremendously rewarding as we faced each obstacle together, trying to survive and enjoy, oh and do a little better than the other. The next obstacle was an over-under drill where four pipes were above the water by maybe 6-8 inches and you cleared the first by climbing over, then you had to go under the second, with the third and fourth being the same. Keeping your face out of the muddy water was the challenge. Following that was a nice mud pit that most people tried to stay on their feet through. We decided on another tact. We went Superman dive into a penguin belly slide and we flipped mid slide and did the back-stroke out of the was epic and people applauded and gave us hugs just to get partially muddy.

There was a rope ladder climb, a tire course, a few hay bale pyramids, as many hurdles as they could fit, some ninja turtle sewer pipe crawls, and a really tall American flag fence to climb. The run ended with a slow amble down the beach where I might have been heard screaming' "if you're not going to play Chariots of Fire, I'm not running!" A final crawl under barbed wire through some more mud and we finished. Behind many and ahead of some, we were soaked and more than ready for pictures!

Did I mention I am never getting Mud out from some places?

Did I mention I am never getting Mud out from some places?
Here we are a little less clean, did you see the color of my "white" socks? Since you asked, here's my "most muscular" shot with Teenwolf. Note, the heart is a muscle.

Please click on over to Dude Write to read the other Dude Writers and vote for my entry starting Sunday at 9pm.


Friday, October 19, 2012

100 Word Song - Falling to Pieces

My Blog Can Beat Up Your Blog

Blogger note: this post was written for a challenge at Lance Burson's blog lancemyblogcanbeatupyourblog where entrants listen to a song and write exactly 100 words in response.

Here is my entry to Faith No More's Falling to Pieces.


"Woman trouble?" the guy behind the counter asked.

"You don't know the half of it," was all he could come up with.

"I see guys with wild stories all the time, in the end you all always come to me."

Three dozen roses should send the right message, he thought. So many decisions to make, he had to win her heart. He'd had it ever so briefly. His wife was going to be pissed. His daughter was not going to understand. Too many women were going to be unhappy and it was all his fault.

His brother's wife was pregnant.


Sunday, October 14, 2012

Spending Life's Budget

So here is the question:


You have $5000 and you can either spend it taking your kids to Disney for a week...










You can take yourself on a 3 week trip to the islands or similar escape.


This seems like an easy question, no matter the answer. For those without kids, this may be the reason they chose not to procreate and those who've reached the golden age of grandparenting may be pondering a similar choice.


For some, this question boils down to a different question. Do you want to create lasting memories that your children will remember forever and want to pass on to their children? Or, do you want your kids to remember you as a heartless, selfish douchenozzle who left them home eating PB & J while you had Mai Tais on the beach after 18 holes and a relaxing massage?


I can hear the cries of the dissenters now. They would ask, do you want to create an unrealistic expectation for your kids of an overly expensive and stressful trip that they will take for granted, expecting you to top the experience each year, likely taking decades off of your life? Or, do you care about being thought of as a heartless, selfish douchenozzle while you are getting a Mai Tai enhanced massage on the beach after the best 18 holes of your soon to be long life?

For those of us with kids, this struggle is ongoing.

We want to be viewed as our kids' hero. We want to give them the best of us, knowing that doing so is going to deplete us. We need to recharge so we can continue. We want to make memories that will last even if we don't. Living a long life filled with great memories is the goal. Living a long life as a selfish curmudgeon versus a shorter, potentially more stressful life building memories is the decision.

Cliche as it may sound, the amount of time in your life, to me, isn't as important as the amount of life in the time.

So last question...anybody have $10,000 to give me?

Oh, and four weeks of vacation?


Dude Write


These are all things we don't think about when we are 18 and plan to live forever. This is linked up to Dude Write 18 where the Dudes write, read, and likely scratch. Check us out.


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