Monday, December 31, 2012

REDUX 1: Shaken Not Stirred

Because I am twisted, over the next 5 days I am going to post the 5 lowest viewed blogs from my 2012 blogs.  (I'm throwing out the YouTubes and the NFL stuff, but all the usual parentheses posts are here.) Chances are there’s at least a few you never saw the first time around. Some for the first time WITH pictures!

Originally Posted 1/28/2012

It seems so easy...  

You throw it out there, make a connection, a little squeeze, a little up and down action...

Dogs do it.

That's right, I'm talking about shaking hands.  It's too easy, right?

A good handshake is harder than it seems.

I know a guy, we'll call him Bear, who seriously shakes hands.  I mean he takes it very seriously. I've had to re-shake because we've done it in a way that isn't up to his high standards.

You see most people extend their arm prior to the handshake, which I am sure is the "spirit" of the handshake. I won't debate or bore you with the origins of the handshake, but stories say that it was a method to show that you weren't holding a weapon.

By extending your arm, and I've seen people even lean forward a bit, you lose the ability to "attack" the handshake. You leave yourself open to the whims of the person you will shake with. They could take any number of lesser handshake styles leaving you with no choice but to accept it:

1. The Finger Squeezer - No intention to shake your hand, this handshake grabs your fingers and can be painful if a forceful squeeze is employed. 

2. Limping Along - this is almost opposite of the first one.  In this variation, the other person gives only his/her fingers with a slightly bent wrist.

3. Hand Slap - no shake at all, but a side five. Not horrible, but no connection.

Now, the Bear method involves a method I like to call "Cocked and Locked." When Bear is planning to shake your hand, there is "the look". Eyes are slightly wider, there is a definite smile (mainly because he knows what's coming.)

The approach is measured, he's a tall dude and could make up the distance between you and he so quickly that it it could be a hug instead of a handshake, and he'd be ok with that too!

The best part of the whole deal is the body position; left arm out a bit to the side with a "you could shake or you could hug, but this wingspan only gets bigger and you won't escape" vibe. Almost like a gun fighter, the right arm is high and tight to his body, hand already in pre-shake position with nothing all flim-flam... coiled... ready to strike out and attack the shake.

As the distance closes, you ready for the shake.


Then it begins, the right arm shoots out... web attacking's like a hand slap in its suddenness, yet it holds. It is a healthy wild shaking. It is solid and strong, yet because the grip is deep, like a baseball into the web of a glove, there is no pain.

Few words describe the sensation, the one I would use is "genuine."

Do you have a good handshake or could it use some work?


  1. I have little hands and people usually shake my fingers. My goal in 2013 is to grow bigger hands. Happy New Year.

  2. You know what they say about a man with little hands, right?

    Little gloves...





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