Despite that, they let me come anyway.
Seriously, I undertook running a local program at our school. Since Sunday is Princess Sassy Pants' 8th birthday, I decided Friday would be a good day to
I signed in at the school and got my Paw Print name badge as well as my Raptor "not a predator, you got scanned" badge. I wanted a clipboard and a walkie talkie, but alas, I was denied. I greeted the kids as they came in for the day, many with that look of "you ain't seen naughty yet." Then my glamorous Television career kicked off with my introduction on the school morning TV program. I think they may even have some shots of me rocking the pledge of allegiance. They sang America the Beautiful after that and I'm pretty sure they muted my microphone for that.
First duty: bad-ass grounds patrolling. I bring the Randy "Dawg" Jackson to this job. OK, I think the letter of the law is walk the perimeter of the school and check doors, but I gotta add swagger and moves like Jagger which roughly looks exactly like the types of people we're trying to keep out of the school. Let's just saying I was baiting them, you know, in case they were hiding in the bushes.
Then after the grounds were safe, I went all puffed-up-chest routine on the hallways making sure no dangerous objects were in evidence, which loosely translates to tucking backpack straps and coats into the lockers that they are creeping out of.
Then the best part of the day (at that time)... Flirting with the hot secretary in the office. She appreciates my moves like Jagger. Getting a little hot coffee while chatting her up...good times! My awesome(ly funny) moves and swagger like Jagger earned me an invite to a happy hour with some possibility of taking her back to my place, oh yeah!
|Makes me miss breakfast a little more...|
|Lines? Where we're going |
we don't NEED Lines!
And then the world of "lines" came back into my purview. Actual non-electronic art is not my forte. I was sitting trying very hard not to let the ADHD spur me to greener pastures, but I am a D.O.G. of my word and I worked my way through my perfectionista persona and the evidence of my hard work is pictured here, and that's a fact! (not just my opinion)
And we're walkin'
I had no idea that the building was that big or that I was on my feet that much but numbers don't lie. The app for MapMyFitness seems to take some liberal interpretations of coloring inside the lines as I certainly crossed no roads while inside the building, though some classrooms were construction zone loud.
Speaking of things you can do on your feet AND my moves like (Jimmy) Swaggart, yeah I worked a serious chicken dance with the Kindergarten class and I'm pretty sure I was memorable. I'm out on a limb, but they're going to do that dance at their weddings in my honor!
Then I went all OCD...
So they have a class schedule that is impossible to follow because instead of periods, they allow each grade to set a schedule, provided they fit in all the work and they work around pre-defined lunch schedules. (so the K class doesn't scare the 4th grade)
Well this thing was awful! I know some serious work went into it at the grade level, but I can describe it and can't show a picture, so you'll have to go with me on this. I was ready to install Microsoft Project just so I could rock a nice Gant chart or something. Instead I rolled with Excel and made each column 5 minutes, then I compacted the columns to 1.00 in width. I then counted and recounted and used merged cells to represent the big chunks of time and put class names into those blocks. As an added bonus, I color coded the classes so they really pop. Of course, if they don't have a color printer, I'll be returning to color in with crayola markers...ugh.
|PSP enjoyed the day, all that counts!|