Monday, December 5, 2011


I used to work in downtown Annapolis.  I had the luxury of working in a building that had a roof that was 2 stories above a main thoroughfare.

There was an old dude a genius who owned a Lamborghini who would park said car on this main drag. His routine was to park, then sit on a bench a few cars away.  He would simply wait and watch. I'm sure he enjoyed the attention his car garnered from all the guys walking along, but he wasn't watching for them.  


He was watching for the attractive women to take an interest in his car and then he would approach and see if the attention was transferable. Talk about your "honey pot."

So we made a fairly regular habit on nice days to eat our lunch on the roof of the building.  It was a beautiful view of the water, but we could also peer over the side to watch passers by and some of their oddities. It was to this car and man that our interest was drawn on this day.  We watched as he made several unsuccessful attempts at picking up women looking at his car.  I remembered thinking that he had quite the little system and probably if able to afford the car, he was probably a man of some "doesn't have to work for a living."

Anyway, on this day, we got an unexpected bonus in the form of two young men, riding bicycles, wearing ties and backpacks...yeah you know who I am talking about, I don't need to draw you a picture...

Yeah, young men on LDS...  Mormons.

I tend to forget that for the most part, guys are guys, Mormon or not. A hot car is a hot car, Mormon or not. (when a car is that expensive it is, by definition, it's own religion.)

So these young men park their bicycles and I suppose prepare to hand out tracts to passers by and oglers of the car.  But they can't leave it at that, the car weakens their temptation to drool probably like kryptonite makes Superman drool.

So anyway, the two yutes begin a slow circle around the car.  It is at that time that I became a creep and decided to mess with them.  Ever so slowly I shifted myself to a point where I can lean out from the building.

In my best Bill Cosby imitating God voice, I say strongly " Coveting!"
I could swear to you that those guys would be our Tour De France team next year given the speed at which they rode out of there.

What's the meanest cool / funny thing you've ever done?


  1. LOL.  I can't even begin to start on the meanest cool thing I've ever done. The list is miles long...

  2. How about the funniest meanish cool thing?

  3. I remember that day, believe it or not.  It was also the day that Ballard dared me to chuck a meatball from my sub into said car.  I declined.  Not because I feared I would miss, but because I was hungry.

    It was a good lunch!

  4. Lol. I had forgotten that meatball detail!

  5. I totally should have chucked it.  That guy was rather, hmm, arrogant.  It would've been worth it!

  6. Talk about a vicious attack...I bet their sacred undergarments got into quite a twist.

    As for me, I do mean things contantly--too many to ennumerate.

    Susan Says...

  7. I have a lot of mean readers... So mean they can't list all their cool mean things. I don't think that was the demographic I was shooting for? Lol
    Autocorrection Typos courtesy of iPhone

  8. This is amazing.

    I am coveting the fuck out of that Lambo.




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